Friday, May 30, 2014

She'd Be Proud

     Today I spent most of the day helping my grandma (Mamadee) sort through pictures so that they could be put in albums. Some of those pictures were of me when I was younger, from times I can remember and from when I was really young. As I looked at those pictures, I remembered a little bit about things I aspired to be when I was a little girl, and I realized that I am someone who the younger me was really like.
     For some of the years of my childhood, I really wanted to be a writer and I believe I have begun to accomplish that. If I could tell younger me that things she wrote would be published in the newspaper, and that she would have a blog that people actually read, I think she would be so excited. If she knew that she would get to go to college and sit and have discussions about books with an educated, intelligent college professor who really knew how to discuss that kind of thing, she would love it.
     If she knew that one day she would travel all the way to Honduras on an airplane and experience a real life mission trip, she would hardly believe it.
     Sometimes I have a bad habit of comparing myself to other people my age, which never makes me happy. When I realize that other people my age have real jobs and serious relationships, I sometimes think I must be doing something wrong. What if I am trapped in this phase forever and never move forward? But then I realize that sometimes the younger me felt the same way. She worried that she would never grow up and that she would never actually achieve those dreams, but guess what? She did. I need to remember that when I start worrying about what everyone else is doing. I hope, that eighteen years from now, I am someone who eighteen year old me would be proud of.

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